Peace in My Insides

I love Fridays. Even though I still have to work, it feels a little more relaxed. People at my work are sensitive to limit meetings on Fridays. Back in my workaholic days I would have been put off by this, but now I celebrate it. I’m hoping this might bleed into Thursdays soon and eventually we’ll just stop meetings all together.

I do have one meeting at 8:30 but it is pretty low key. It is mostly sunny out but there are a good amount of large fluffy clouds about. When the sun is exposed, it feels bright and warm but the clouds, often enough, hide the sun and it feels cooler and looks more dim. I’m not sure if over time, the sunny periods will become less frequent. This weekend is supposed to maybe bring rain. Also winds are due to pickup from the west soon. I figure I better get to the beach sooner than later - that actually feels like a healthy general rule.

I get to the parking lot and the sun shines down on me and it all feels super nice. I walk down the stairs and stare at the water and it looks smoother than yesterday. We might be in that gap where the wind shifts from offshore to onshore. The tide is quite low and the beach looks wonderful. The sand feels warm on my feet and the water feels slightly warmer than yesterday as I walk to my usual take off spot.

I walk out into the water. The water feels more tame than yesterday. It’s not totally glassy but everything looks less wobbly. The water temperature was 63 this morning, but like yesterday, it feels warmer than that. It’s nice. Not decadent, but nice.

I swim north today. As I am swimming past the Ritz, I note how wonderful this all is. Things always seem like they might be less than wonderful on the walk down the stairs. I am warm and dry and about to be not so much that and it is hard to see that as a good thing. So as I swim here on the cooler and wetter side of that thought process, I check my doubts against my present experience and the doubts just blow away in the wind with no firm ground to stand on.

The entire swim is delightful. Just as I was noticing through my apartment windows earlier in the morning, the light dims and brightens and dims and brightens again. The water is very comfortable. I have this feeling of peace in my insides as I swim. It’s hard to put a finger on. It’s a lightness. Is it centered in my heart? My belly? I can’t tell. It’s all over. I have an idea why but it’s not something I want to share here.

I am loving the clouds in the sky. They are not the streaky'/hazy variety, but these puffy, distinct balls of vapor. They create cool patterns with the pure blue sky and cast this delightful shade on the water. I get to my northern turnaround point and find myself inside this huge patch of kelp. The leaves are floating on the surface and the sun is shining on them. I love this. I see it often and it never gets old. The leaves and vines are electric bright gold and everything looks alive because it is.

On the way back I watch this one outside set of waves break super close. It’s a larger than normal set but they just gently crumble and don’t appear at all volatile. I pause and watch the entire set and then I adjust my trajectory because I should obviously be swimming a little further offshore.

I eventually make it back from where I came. As I am swimming through the surf. This one wave curls right in front of me and I get a shot of the face and know that I either got a perfect sandy barrel shot or underwater darkness. Alas it was the latter. BUT, I SAW the former and I can still see it now.